The Better Days of Valentine’s Day

I’m writing this considering the fact that I can’t stand Valentine’s Day in any shape or form. It just seems that holidays in general just get worse as you get older, but none so in fact than this very day as it manages to make every person who happens to be single feel like absolute shit. For those who do have something to do on this day, I wish you a happy Valentine’s Day and hope you put some thought into your gifts of roses and chocolate that probably had no thought put into it whatsoever. I am a hopeless romantic though, so I can’t completely be negative about the day.

I have bad memories associated with this though, so i’d like to think about a simple time back when Valentine’s Day was actually kind of exciting. I’m talking about elementary school where the goodies came in the form of Valentine’s Day cards. Yes, you know what I speak of – these cards that could either make or break you with fellow students if you had “cool” cards that people actually wanted from you. To get that one card from the girl who went from cootie-infested to something more…interesting and more confusing, who if you were to recieve the dreaded “friend” card for V-day, would ultimately crush you for the rest of your elementary school life. These are what made this day great in my opinion, and I remember having so many different kinds of cards. The stressful thought that went into who’s name went on which card in which i’m sure you’re laughing now but come on – you did this too.

I went searching around the net for some cards to make examples of, and I couldnt’ believe the ones I found. We have card sets here from Super Mario Bros. 3, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Obviously this is geek alert with these, but you can’t deny how cool it was to have these cards in your posession.

These Mario ones were from one of the best games in the entire series. Look at this frog one with Luigi who will “go to any depth to be your Valentine.” as he’s so desperate since he’s Mr. second fiddle to Mario that he’ll even wear a frog suit to jump in your pants and/or steal your panties.

The fourth card shows a little violence on Mario’s part, as we can all attest to that love doesn’t come without a little violence as we see here in the form of jumping on poor bones of turtles in the name of love. Even icons like Mario have to show tough love every once in a while.

These next set of cards has a very sad Hammer Brother or whatever it’s called. He’s obviouisly sad because he has no pants on and his groin area is just out there in the open. Look at Mario’s reaction, he’s freaking out cos the guy has no genitals. Ladies would you give a valentine to some dude with no gentials? I thought not.

Next we have my all-time favorite childhood obsession – The Ninja Turtles. I couldn’t tell you how much money my parents have spent in my collection of these green dudes. I have this picture somewhere of me where i’m posing with my army of Ninja Turtle figurines, sadly that’ll stay in The Yellow Stereo vault away from curious eyes till the end of time.

Let’s take a look at these, as the first three seem pretty normal as they use a lot of the popular catch phrases. The fourth though, seems kind of suggestive in a different manner to which children our age would have no knowledge of. Bebop and Rocksteady were teammates in the cartoon, but here they are portrayed of teammates of a different sort.

Finally we have a last set of cards with even more ridiculous catch phrases. Would Raphael really say “You’re mondo to the max!” I think not, but who really cares. The last card we have the old rat Splinter taking a chance and admitting his love for April. I’m not sure what to think of this card, as i’m guessing it’s for ugly people who have no chance at their crush. It’s saying that it’s ok to get turned down by hotties because you’re still a fucking ugly rat.

That’s all for this little Valentine’s Day themed post. Hope you have a good one, and here’s songs because I can’t post anything without songs!

“Love Is No Big Truth” | Kings Of Convenience
“True Love Waits” | Radiohead
“I Will Keep the Bad Things From You” | The Damnwells
“A Dreamy Day Daydreaming of You” | Of Montreal
“The Book of Love” | The Magnetic Fields
“If We Can Land a Man on the Moon, Surely I Can Win Your Heart” | Beulah
“Perfect Lovesong” | The Divine Comedy
“I Love You Anyways” | Travis
“(Please) Lose Yourself in Me” | My Bloody Valentine
“My Funny Valentine” | Rufus Wainwright
“I Love You Anyways” | Travis
“Let My Love Open The Door” | M. Ward
“Shining Light” | Ash
“There Is A Light That Never Goes Out” | The Smiths

This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 14th, 2007 at 9:21 am and is filed under Random, The Yellow Stereo. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.